Oregon or Washington

I graduate in a week. After that I will be thrust into the “real world” (debate that as you may). I technically won’t be unemployed because I have procured a summer barn job as I had wanted to. However, I will not (as of the present) have accepted my worth-4-years-of-J-school job. If that state of being persists, the plan remains that as soon as my lease is up on July 31, I will move out to Oregon or Washington. This is what I’ve told everyone who asks the worst question: “so what are you doing after graduation?”

Here’s the thing: by mid-July, I will need to actually choose Oregon OR Washington.

Honestly I don’t think this can be considered an easy decision. Both states are considered the Pacific Northwest. Both have mountains (Washington’s are taller). Both have about the same amount of rainfall (between 1 and 5.5 inches).

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Here‘s a state fact comparison. I mean, Washington has George on its flag, but Oregon has the symbol of a beloved late 90s computer game. How does one really go about choosing?

Politically, both are blue (democratic for those non-Americans) states. Washington is known for its lack of state income tax. Oregon doesn’t have sales tax.

Washington has more people and Oregon has more women. Both are pretty diverse, especially on the coast. Both have nearly identical age demographics.

THEY EVEN HAVE NEARLY IDENTICAL CRIME STATISTICS. But, Oregon has significantly less violent crime; it wins at larceny instead.

Gross State Product winner: Washington by roughly 150,000. It also has a higher per capita income (probably has something to do with that tax).

There is a pretty strong college football rivalry between the Oregon Ducks and the Washington Huskies. Throwback to MU-KU, it is also called the “Border War.” At least my vernacular doesn’t have to change. Washington is leading this rivalry 58-43-5, but the Ducks are on a 10 year winning-streak. Last season the Ducks went 11-1 and the Huskies only had a 7-5 season. But, Washington has 2 national titles historically and is also ahead 15-10 in conference. Fight songs are “Mighty Oregon” and “Bow down to Washington.” To be fair, in elementary school, I used to be a Husky.

Major League Soccer, which I know is important to everyone, separates the two states with the Portland Timbers and the Seattle Sounders. The last game they played ended in a tie, 4-4. But, Seattle leads the Western Conference. The Timbers sit at 7 of 9.

Oregon doesn’t have an NFL team. Washington definitely does, if anyone remembers last year’s Superbowl like I do. Oregon also doesn’t have a Major League Baseball team (though coming from my home city of KCMO, that’s not a big difference…they all just started screaming at me). Once again, Seattle hosts one: the Mariners. They play Kansas City today, actually (they won yesterday). If I were a KC fan I would point out that the Royals have 1 world series to the Mariners’ 0 (ooo, impressive).

If you’re a big wine drinker (I’m not) this infographic might make the decision for you:

Both cities have world-reknowned zoos. I love me some zoos. While I doubt these will beat Henry-Doorly in Omaha, NE, they are the Oregon Zoo and the Woodland Park Zoo. Best comparison: Oregon Zoo: 2,200 animals of 260 species. Woodland Park: 1,098 and 300. 

From what I have heard, Portland is home to tons of hipsters and Seattle is a bit more business-minded. Here’s a list of companies based in or near Seattle. Nike is in Oregon, though. Oregon is a bit more of a foodie place, too.

Oregon has more volcanoes, but Washington is more likely to have an earthquake. Oregon is closer to California, Washington is closer to Canada.

Washington has legal recreational marijuana, Oregon is medical only. I’m comparing everything here.

From what I have read, Oregon coastline is better, but Washington has better sounds (also known as a straight, or a large, inland sea).

Washington is obviously home of one million Starbucks, but you know what chain they only have 5 of? Sonic. That’s right, unless I live in Seattle or Ferndale, I’m out of luck when I want a cherry limeade. Admittedly, Oregon is short on them, too, with only 8 (I think).

In Washington I can get my name spelled properly on my license plate: ALLYMAC. And it’s available, I checked. And on that same note, apparently Washingtonians have better morals than Oregonians.

I’m open to suggestions.

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